Thursday, 11 June 2009
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Thursday Therapy
It has not been a good week. Tuesday I had jury duty (yay no work). But when I got home I got onto the computer and then everything started going downhill. Our computer is ancient. It’s terribly slow. We know NOTHING about computers. Long story short, there were raised voices and tears. I hate that I expect my husband to be Mr. Fix-It. Why do I put such high expectations on him? Any why do I also no communicate these expectations. Life would be easier if I would say, “Honey I want you to do this.” And then when he doesn’t and I get upset, he knows why. Instead I expect him to 1) read my mind, 2) accomplish said mental instructions, and 3) know why I’m mad when he doesn’t accomplish said mental instructions. Dumb Kristin!!!
In the world today I’m lucky that I have a job. But today I just have not appreciated it. We received the month end calendar today. It’s the schedule of events surrounding the month close (when things are due, when numbers will be sent out, etc). Because July 4th falls on a Saturday, it’s being observed on Friday, July 3rd. As of right now I will be working on the 3rd and the 5th, forfeiting my holiday weekend. I’m really glad that we had nothing planned.
There are a few times during the year when we have to work on weekends or be on call. Most often it’s during the end of the year, when we need to get the numbers in because it’s the end. I understand that. I hate that I don’t really have a Christmas vacation but I guess I’m used to it. It just depresses me that more and more of my time is being spent at work and not with people I love. It’s things like this that makes me want to pop out a dozen kids so I can finally quit this job. But that’s another story, too long to post. Ugh. The chances of me being able to stay at home are highly unlikely and that depresses me more.
I am currently on a conference call for my new job. I presented my data for the first 40 min. Now I’m just listening to everyone else. How did my part go??? I’m sure it’s not as bad as I think, but I feel like a failure. I have been in this job about 4 months now. But I don’t seem to be learning anything. I get asked these questions, and don’t know how to answer. I feel like everything I presented had errors in it. I had to fight back tears. I don’t know how to fix the problems. At this point I know how to update the reports, how to work the formula’s, etc. I don’t know why numbers are going up and down. What assumptions do I make? How can I know if that’s an appropriate assumption or not? Am I being too conservative or liberal in my forecast? I know that this will all come in time (hopefully). After all, the guy I’m replacing had been doing this for 10 years. That’s a lot of experience and knowledge! I feel like there is a lot of pressure on me in this job. I’m not yet 25. I’m in a high profile position. My managers have all noticed the great work I’ve done as an FA. But it’s not that I wonder if I bit off more than I can chew.
I need retail therapy. Or chocolate!
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